The truth is diary, I am tired! I throw my hands in the air and just don’t care anymore. It’s not like anyone believes I can do it anyway, so why bother myself? Why give myself the headache? Mum thinks I should be a nurse, well at least its science oriented. But dad has thrown my idea out the window completely and thinks I should be a journalist! He clearly doesn’t believe that I can do the sciences and in my head, I’m just thinking, if my folks don’t think I can do it, then who will? I mean they literally gave birth to me!

Then don’t even get me started on life being the eldest. I mean no one really says it other than mum sometimes, about how I am the hope of the home and an example to my siblings. Look! I’m a little fed up to be honest, come on people cut me some slack! I mean who do I look like Jesus? You can’t expect me to hold in my hands, my future and the future of all the ones who were born after me, it’s not logical, it’s not even fair! Wake up and smell the Roses guys’, I am not Jesus! Notice my skirt? I’m a girl!

Then the other day when Sammie, Trevor and Lexy came to visit, oh that was helpful! I know you can’t see, but I have rolled my eyes so far back I can literally see my brain. They have life all figured out and they are clearly happy and content.  I am clearly the only one still trying to figure myself out. I am the only one going koo koo!

I mean look at me I am most likely going to end up a beggar living on the corner of Moi Avenue and Kimathi Street. You know what since my fate is clearly already sealed I might as well get a head start on my new life. I simply can’t take it anymore and I just don’t want to care anymore. I don’t want feel the pressure and I won’t! I have full control over what will happen and I just choose not to care anymore. Whatever happens, happens and I’m alright with that. Whatever!!!!!!!

If anyone needs me I’ll be on the corner of Moi Avenue and Kimathi Street not caring about life, and anyone who is opposed, well too bad! I don’t need that kind of negativity in my life.